Monday 24 February 2014

24/02/2014 - THEY WANTED A BUTLER


They wanted a butler with a hand in the butter and butter churning process with a steady twist of an unsteady crank. Some of them wanted to vouch for an iconic televisual experience instead but the investment just wasn’t practical and besides they had too many fetching suits not to use them. The world did what it could to ignore their pleas and please and thank yous and letter qs but the dietary quail was just too odious a scent to refuse. They were helpless and dying of shame in the face of a blue-veined lawman. The system has undergone several unique developments including unicorn enlargement and prattling on about Miss Nancy, whoever she is in this greyscale backdrop.
This is how the DVD collection collapsed on them, this is the story that comes out of avoiding the main plotline with tact and pomp, this is the racy images that are fed into the blinks of an early learning child. They must develop correctional facilities for children such as these, kiddies need to be debugged and turned into rectors purely for the attendance of quality dinner parties. The conversation must be sparkling and nope to everything else. They are out for the best hard copy of the Finnish Dictionary as soon as all back’s are turned and all sweaty dress straps are sliced off with cruise cutter scissors. Everything must be beyond the lap in the same way that nothing must collect £200 and $200 to spend willy-nilly on knick-knacks and undercarriages. The air marshal has his facts straight and has every intention to wed you to that Finnish Waiter over there. It’s a complex, a dramatic difficulty for encouragement’s sake.
 
            You didn’t get the job of course. You grabbed your car and you shouldn’t have done it without firing up the spittoon or channelling all forms of qi straight through your chakras. This manacle ruffles the rictus right up and into rickets of perfect diamond formation. See how they fan out for the air marshal and his impeccable skill. He has eaten more than his fair share of trade issues, swallowed them back and gargled them down with mouth water and salty roofs. You’ll get over it like you always do; you’ll tie up all the sticks in the house and bundle them into the back of your bandwagon just to shout timber at every passing case of simpatico. You’ll get your own way and the rich bitch will forgive you like an Australian in a women’s magazine.
 
            I, on the other hand, must remain the grease paint on the clown’s face, the bowler at the stump, the long and lonely party favour which everybody supersedes and nobody can count on. I live a charmed existence of spiteful hand gestures, they have become my overcoat and doused in the flame of a thirty-year-old holy man’s blessing. Radiation tongues are blistering my babyish beard and the moustache hasn’t even been touched. Is God trying to send me a message? Might or may.

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